Costa Rica Adventure: Week 15 – Letting Go

IMG_0277I read this quote after making a really tough decision, and immediately recognized it’s truth.  Worthwhile advice – none of which comes easily, but that last part – letting go when things don’t go as planned…for me that’s the toughest.

My whole life has been about making plans, setting goals and working to achieve them. Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I fail. Most often, the result lies somewhere in the middle.

When Dave and I decided we wanted to live in Costa Rica, we put a lot of thought into it. In fact, we’ve been thinking and talking about it for our entire 12-year marriage. So when we decided in June to move to Costa Rica for a year, to manage this bed and breakfast/coffee shop, the decision took two minutes. Primarily because we knew we were ready.

Once we shifted gears – from dreaming to doing, we operated like a well-oiled machine. We said goodbye to our friends, found tenants for our condo, found people to help us manage our business, sold both of our cars, and gave away, threw away or sold all but our furnishings, a small hall closet of boxes and the four suitcases we brought here with us.  And we found an amazingly nurturing animal-lover, who would keep our dogs for the year we were gone. All with astonishing speed. Three weeks from the day we agreed to take the gig, to the day I got here. It wasn’t easy, but it all just flowed; leaving us basking in an “it’s obviously meant to be” glow.

If you’ve been reading along, you know that about a month into our big adventure, we got word from the doggie-keeper that things had changed quite radically for her and because of her life circumstances, she’d no longer be able to keep the pups. EEK! “OK fine. We got this!”, we thought as she, Dave and I all worked to find a new home for Ladybug and Leo.

Reliving the details of the past few months of “Operation Dog Rehoming” isn’t something I care to do, so let’s just say it’s been sad, expensive, frustrating and stressful. Living our Costa Rica dream went from utopian to impossible, and the harder we tried, the unhappier we became.

I was angry. “Why is this so hard?”, I constantly wondered. “The dogs are awesome! They are cute, sweet, hilarious and sleep for 18 hours a day. Who wouldn’t want to keep them?” One particularly frustrating day, while on the phone to my mom, I flippantly said, “I guess we’ll just have to go home.” I was being dramatic and throwing an adult version of a hissy fit. But once I’d said the words, they echoed in my head for weeks.

While we were exploring other parts of Costa Rica and housesitting in Atenas, Dave and I got into the habit of a daily walk. Walking for two plus hours a day provides ample opportunity to clear your head and talk things out. Neither one of us wanted to leave Costa Rica. And yet we’d tried every, single reasonable* thing we could think of and still had nowhere for the dogs to go. (*I refused to consider a shelter or Craigslist. Which, by the way – I learned Craigslist is where those despicable dog-fighting people go to find their “bait”. HORRIBLE!) It was time to face the music. There was clearly only one solution left on the table. We needed to go home.

We let the decision simmer for the remainder of our time away from the bed and breakfast. When we returned, we knew what we had to do.

I wrote out a note, explaining the situation to the B&B owners, and offered to help them find and train our replacements. I hated to send it – knowing how stressful it would feel to be on the other side of the computer screen. Five minutes after I hit send, I saw a post on a Costa Rican Expat Facebook group I belong to from a couple with experience managing small hotels and properties, looking for a six-month gig. They were in Costa Rica already and had spent the last six months spending a month here and there and were ready to settle down for a while. Seriously? No way! Could this be more perfect?

I forwarded the post to the owner. She hated to hear that we needed to leave, but agreed this new couple sounded perfect. Within 48 hours, after a few Facebook exchanges, emails, and phone calls, it was a done deal. Dave and I would head back in Austin at the end of October and the new caretakers would spend a week here with the owner getting trained and acclimated and life would carry on.

Just. Like. That.

There you have it. Probably not the weekly update you were expecting. No monkeys, no spiders, no recipes and no crafts. Just regular old life – where plans are made and then things change. Where what you expect is rarely what you get. Where sometimes your expectations are exceeded, and sometimes you are let down. But where if you let go of trying to make it all work out and instead remain open to what may come, you find that things have a way of working out. With rare exception, no matter how complicated the question, the answer is simple.

I’m letting go of things not meant for me. Gracefully? Not exactly. But I’m working on it.

———-xo

If you think the Big Lombard Life Adventure is over – you are wrong! Can you guess what’s next for us – where we’ll end and what we’ll do when we get there? If you think you’ve figured it out, please let us know because we’re on the edge of our seat. One thing is for sure – it will be surprising, wonderful, scary, thrilling and huge! So stayed tuned for weekly updates as we wind down our Costa Rica Adventure 1.0 and figure out firm up our plans for the next adventure.

15 thoughts on “Costa Rica Adventure: Week 15 – Letting Go

  1. I know it is sad for you two but you have lived the experience, not as long as you would have liked but you did it! Love you !

    1. Thank you Kris! We are definitely filled with a mix of emotions right now. But you are right – we came, we saw, we enjoyed every moment. It was shorter than we thought it would be, but we haven’t a single regret! Love you too!

  2. We will miss you, what would have been…and look forward to following you here and seeing what will be. If you ever come back…I owe you a BIG lunch! And will throw in a cabina for you and Dave! Dogs welcome! Pura Vida…vaya con amor, salud y suerte!

    1. Thank you Zene! We have enjoyed this little slice of Costa Rican paradise and especially all the wonderful people we met as a result of being here. We WILL be back and when we are, we’ll take you up in the lunch, no doubt! Be well and keep this place fabulous for us, will ya!?! XO

  3. Wow!
    Sorry to hear that the Costa Rican dream is coming to a premature end.
    I am quite sure there is another grand adventure for you right around the corner.
    Safe travels back to Austin.
    Much love to you both.

    Cheers!

    1. A big old Texas THANK YOU Al, from Dave and I both! We appreciate your support through this journey and you are absolutely right…another adventure coming soon! Wonder what it will be?!?

  4. Ah Melissa, That “letting go of how I thought it should be” is one of the hardest. Good for you for moving forward and getting ready for the next adventure. We will be happy to have you back in the states! So.will your lucky dogs. You are doing the right thing.

  5. When you let go of trying to make it all work out and remain open things have a way of happening for the best for everyone…and it does feel so true this time around, your dogs will have constant loving care from you both after an extended visit in Cr and hopefully with your open spirit everything else in your life will once again fall into place for you both
    Your passion for learning about life and living it to the fullest will definitely be missed by so many in our neighborhood. Do come back and visit you are welcome anytime!
    much love
    Gwen and Edmund

    1. Gwen and Ed – Thank you for your caring and understanding! This decision would have been so much harder without it. We’ll certainly be back to this magical place…someday!

  6. Hello Melissa,

    Another great read. Thank you for sharing a true adventure.

    As a fellow dog lover – I share your passion and resolve.

    Perhaps you can help me start my new adventure in Austin, TX? (New job – northwest Austin, starting October 13, 2014). Need help finding home/living complex near Lakeway Regional Medical Center/Falcon Head Golf course area – or suggestion?

    Michael Clark

    1. Michael – First off, thank you for note and your encouragement. And second of all – welcome (almost) to one of the greatest cities in the world! 🙂 I’ll gladly help you find somewhere to call home (I just happen to know a little something about that!). Watch for an email.

  7. The Universe was telling you in several ways that your time in CR was done & that you had accomplished what it wanted you to do. You were actively listening & and took heed. Pets are family members & so important. I have enjoyed reading about your adventures there.Who knows what comes next.

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